THE inspired writer of the Proverbs, speaking of a faithful parent who would encourage his son in ways of righteousness, represents him as saying: "Let thine eyes observe my ways" (Prov. 23:26). It is an appeal of tremendous responsibility to the parent. It invites the child to look closely at parental ways to see therein an example of righteousness. The general parent-child relationship emphasised by the Proverbs, should be closely considered by all Christadelphian parents in these times when parental control is either negligible or lacks the power of sound example. Example can play a major part in educating children in spiritual matters. Let us face facts. How can we expect our children to be loyal to the things of the Truth, if we are half-hearted or hypocritical towards them? What example is it, if we solemnly intone that we are to be separate from the world, and take the family to a theatre, or a drive in? What appeal is it, if a parent speaks impressively about the need for studying the Bible, and then leads the family in several hours of television viewing most evenings? What value is a father's exhortation for the need of dedication in service to Yahweh, if he, at the same time, gives the best of his life to the development of his business affairs? Parents need always to remember that children have remarkable powers of observation and imitation, so that their inconsistencies do not pass unnoticed. How blessed our children would be if we all, in honesty, could echo the words of the wise man: "Let thine eyes observe my ways!" Parents cannot reasonably expect their children to respond to the teaching of the Truth if they are not themselves giving around lead in that direction. The responsibilities of parenthood were impressed by the Law of Yahweh: "I Yahweh thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me" (Exod. 20:5). Yahweh is here referring to those children who follow the example of their parents in hating Him to the extent that they fail to give Him their first love. The point is thus stressed that children follow the lead of their parents. Hatred of Yahweh, manifested by a neglect of His word and commandments, can become a family characteristic if parents give a lead in that direction, to the end that divine retribution will come upon those descendants that follow the example given. How tremendous are the responsibilities of parenthood! However, the voice of Inspiration also observes that "a good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children .... " (Prov. 13:22). What greater inheritance can we give our children than a sound knowledge of God's ways? If a child is thoroughly initiated therein, and a deep love for Yahweh is carefully inculcated (Prov. 22:6), the "Godly seed" will be preserved. In this, the power of example is paramount. Children must be given the opportunity to observe that their parents: « Remain separate from the world; « Educate themselves and the family in divine truth; « Dedicate their Iives to serving Yahweh. Separation, education and dedication comprise three key words for healthy family life in the Truth. A home built on these principles will manifest unity, happiness and wellbeing. There will be greater communion between the Father in heaven, and the family on earth, ensuring that His care and blessing will be extended towards it, to the ultimate eternal benefit of each member. The entire family will learn to develop faith in Yahweh that will ease the trials and difficulties of life. Each member will develop a confidence in the Creator that will have a unifying effect upon the whole family. On the other hand, to allow a child to taste of the world without restraint is equivalent to permitting him to drink a deadly poison. Equally disastrous is to permit children to do as they like. True, the theory of self-expression is widely acclaimed and accepted these days, but so is the incidence of juvenile delinquency: and one stems from the other. Loving but firm discipline is essential if children are to be wisely guided. Again, the book of Proverbs instructs: "Withhold not correction from the child, for if thou beat him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell" (sheol, the grave). The teaching is clear. Paul expressed it this way: "No chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but 9 grievous, nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby" (Heb. 12:11). These two quotations clearly show how that the natural typifies the spiritual. Wise and loving parents will not stand by and permit their children to commit transgressions against divine principles without correcting them. To do otherwise would be to confirm the child in its selfwill. Paul taught: "We have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence; shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits and five?" (v. 9). Live? Yes indeed! Or, as the Proverb has it: "deliver his soul from the grave!" Discipline is essential, if we are to be delivered out of death: and the same principle is equally important as far as our children are concerned. Unfortunately, many parents are far too dilatory in these matters. Paul poses the question: "What son is he whom the father chasteneth not?" To ask is to answer. The only father who would not bother to discipline his child would be one who would be indifferent to his future wellbeing; and such ason would become completely spoiled and selfwilled in his ways. The Ecclesia at Ephesus had become subjected to strong pressure from an evil environment, against which it was struggling for survival. Clearly the effects were felt in individual family units as well as ecclesially. There is a need to strengthen the ties of family life, and to that end the fifth and portion of the sixth chapters were written. Having dealt with husband and wife relationship, Paul turned his attention to the children: "Children! Obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth" (Ch. 6:1-3). The word children is, teknon, which is akin to tikto, signifying to beget, to bear an off-spring. The term does not relate to small children merely, but to those of any age up to the time when they leave home to marry, and begin a home of their own. Loyalty of children towards parents should not be lessened with their growth towards maturity. They should be prepared to obey - a word which signifies to listen, attend, hear, give close attention in order to answer. This latter meaning is intensely interesting when applied to young folk; how difficult it is to get them to remain quiet long enough to hear what their parents are telling them! In this instruction, however, the natural again types the spiritual; for as parents require children to hearken unto them, so they should give their attention to the Father in the heaven. Notice the constant use of the word obey: "He (Christ) became the author of eternal salvation unto all them that obey him ... " "By faith, Abraham, when he was called to go out into a place which he should after receive for an inheritance, obeyed .... " "Ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you" (Heb. 5:9; 11:8; Rom. 6:17). Paul urged that children should obey their parents. Not just one parent, notice. but bat h of them! The unity of the parents is implied, and is stressed in Ephesians 5. But this single word alone is not the complete instruction, for the Apostle added "your parents in the Lord." Such children are, potentially, the continuation of "the holy seed," and therefore have an obligation to their parents above those not in Christ. How sublime that our children learn the principle of obedience to the Father, through filial compliance to the will of their parents. They thus are taught that in such subjection there is a primary responsibility to the Lord. Further; our children should see that this responsibility makes them different, separate from other children. They are called to become part of the "holy seed," and must learn to rise to their responsibilities. This is emphasised by Paul's concluding comment: "for this is right " the word "right" is dikeios, a word used elsewhere of the Father's own character (2 Tim. 4:8; Rev. 16:5). Those "offspring" who learn to abide by these apostolic instructions will be well-pleasing to our heavenly Father, and will exhibit characteristics in which He delights. How wonderful for children to know that they can act in a way that is wellpleasing to Yahweh! Should they not be lovingly encouraged to manifest such ways? Theyare alsa required to honour father and mother. Honour follows obedience. Children must learn that it is pointless for them to claim to honour their parer?ts, if they do not obey them. A beautiful point is set forth in Paul's use of this quotation from Exod. 20:12, namely, that there is promise of reward to those who keep God's commandments! This should never be overlooked in the spiritual education of children. We believe that the glory and reality of the coming Kingdom should ever be set before them. Let them learn to rejoice, with us, in the hope of Israel: to see the Lord Jesus enthroned in glory; to watch the great man Abraham pass into the kingdom; to talk with the apostle Paul; to observe the reaction of the nations to the new world order established by Christ's reign! These things should be living realities in our minds. and should be implanted with enthusiasm into the minds of our children. The truth must live for us; and for our offspring. To Paul's beautiful reference to the Law we can add the words of the Psalmist: "The statutes of Yahweh are right, rejoicing the ear; the commandment of Yahweh is pure, enlightening the eyes ..... Moreover by them is thy servant warned; and in keeping of them there is great reward" (19:8. 11). The final words are addressed to fathers exclusively. They emphasise the enormous responsibility which must be borne by the husband, as the head of the family, though of course, they do not exempt mothers from their part in the spiritual education of the children. "Fathers." wrote Paul, "provoke not your children to wrath." This appears to endorse the popular view that parents should never say anything which might upset the children! But that is not so. The word for provoke means to exasperate, irritate, and clearly alludes to fathers making unreasonable demands upon the children, or being inconsistent in disciplining them. It is of little value to manifest strong discipline in the family today, and none at all tomorrow! The children would never know where they stood! Distasteful exhibitions of ill temper on the part of fathers would also come into this category. Be loving, be firm, be kind, but above all, be consistent. Fathers are required "to bring their children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord" (v. 4 R.S.V). The word rendered "bring them up" is the same as nourisheth in Ch. 5:29, thus providing a link between the two verses. In the former, the apostle wrote: "No man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it." In the latter, Paul reminds fathers that their children are their own flesh. They must cherish the welfare of their children as they would their own bodies. The two words, nurture and admonition, discipline and instruction - R.S.V. have been chosen with delicate perception. Nurture is from the Greek paideia and signifies the training of a child including instruction, education, discipline, rewards and punishments. Admonition is from the Greek nouthesia, which means a putting in mind or, getting the Truth into their heads! Thus in the first of these words we have the training of a child by action: in the second, the training of a child by word. This discipline and instruction is of the Lord, and not of man. It has nothing to do with everyday school work, but concerns spiritual development that will make children: "wise unto salvation" (2 Tim. 3:15). To summarise, fathers who see the need to nourish and cherish their own bodies, must also see the need to do the like towards their wives and children. We conclude by quoting a most beautiful Psalm, one which is a firm favourite in our home, and which is read at the family table many times during the course of a year: "Blessed is everyone that feareth Yahweh; that walketh in His ways. For thou shalt eat the labour of thine hands; happy shalt thou be, and it shall be well with thee. Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olives plants round about thy table. Behold, that thus shall the man be blessed that feareth Yahweh. Yahweh shall bless thee out of Zion: and thou shalt see the good of Jerusalem all the days of thy life. Yea, thou shalt see thy children's children, and peace upon Israel" (Psa. 128). J. UIIman

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